“I do! I do!...”

This week we had a wonderful fellow named Bill Payne (who will be with us next week also). We talked about the Character of God. I find that as I even think about to his teaching my heart starts to pound and my eyes get a bit misty. With that said, let me explain.
Early in the week Bill introduced us to a little thing all humans have, the “Truth Box”. It is the spot in your head that tells you what is truth and what is a lie. The more I learned about my truth box, the more I realized that I had a screwed up truth box! I had believed many lies not only of myself, but of God. And something we learned soon after the truth box was introduced is that when we believe a lie about God we are saying that something is wrong with God’s character OR that God is unable to do what he says. Talk about a hard pill to swallow!
Throughout this week Bill told us things like, “If you were the only person on the earth, God still would have sent Jesus for you” or “God loves the gifts you give him in worship and serving. He loves them because of the WHO is giving them, not what they are!” He even told us the reality that “God DIDN’T change after the fall!” At times these truths were something nice to think about, but I found myself being a bit worried to fully put my trust in them. Until Thursday night…
We had a time of worship for our school, and as we sang the songs I pondered about what we had been learning and was excited for what God was doing in our class. (One thing I have learned, whenever I start thanking God for what he is going in everyone else’s life, he is quick to turn it around on me and I usually end up getting my world rocked by him too.) Out of nowhere I decided to have this conversation with God…
“So… you love me huh?” I asked him (side note, stupid question to ask God because he will always answer this the same way).
“I do! I do! I really REALLY do!” was his response.
And in seconds, I was facedown before God weeping. There is something about hearing God tell you he loves you, and I don’t think I will ever grow tired of it. I can think back to times when God told me he loved me and each of those times, I felt like everything in the world was right and okay.
“You died for me, even though I walked away from you over and over again. You died for me even when I tried to be God and when I have called you a liar. You were murdered protecting me even when I did nothing to protect our relationship. You still suffered the worst death in mankind for my heart, and the selfishness and pride that I have held on to my whole life… you still loved me” as I continued to weep.
“Yeah, I did die for you. If you were the only one left on this earth, I would have still died for you. You are my little girl, and I love you with all I am. I don’t just love you kid, I REALLY love you!” He said that with such a gentle voice and as if he was bowing down from heaven to tell me.
MY PAPA LOVES ME!! HE REALLY LOVES ME!!
I wish I could tell you all the joy that I have had within me since this conversation with the King of Kings. The next day in class we talked about our value, and Bill put it in words that hit home for me, especially after the conversation God and I had the night before. Bill walked us through a story, “I want to go buy a person. I want the top of the line, the most valuable, so I go to the person who is the smartest, drives the best car, have the best job and the highest education. I finally find this person in the store of Humans and I want to buy them, so I flip the over to see the price tag attached to them… and it is far too much! So I put them back and I decide I will go down to the basement and find one of you students. You are not the best looking, you are not the smartest. You don’t drive a nice car, if you have a car at all. You are much less than the most valuable person in the world… so I go to flip over your price tag, and guess what?? Tell me what it said??” He then started at each of us, “It said the same thing as the most “valuable” person in the whole world. It is a price that hardly anyone would pay. What is your price?? EVERY DROP OF JESUS’ BLOOD. EVERY TEAR THAT JESUS WEPT. That is what your price tag says. And that is what the price tag of EVERY human being is, because Jesus died for every human being that has ever, is, or will ever live. Every drop of Jesus’ blood. Every tear Jesus ever wept.”

:)

A few verses that have impacted me this week is what I will leave you with.

“As for the Saints who are in the land (all of us Christians)
they are the glorious ones in whom I delight”      ***Psalm 16:3

“…He is a mighty savior. He will rejoice over you with great gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will exult over you by singing a happy song.”    ***Zephaniah 3:17

Thank you Papa, for showing me the deep love you have for me!

Compassion DTS Love Feast...

There were 2 schools taking place since I have been here; my school is the China Focused DTS and then there is the Compassion DTS. The Compassion team has been back on the base for a few weeks now and we got a chance to spend some time celebrating their graduation from school with a thing called “Love Feast”. It is a time for them to share what the Lord had done during their outreach and share personal testimonies.  They did a wonderful job sharing their hearts, and I must be honest, I got teary eyed more than once in the course of the evening. Many of them have left to go home and it has been a sad goodbye, but we trust the Lord will keep doing great things through them, and a few of them will be coming back to the base in a few months to start staffing! J
Here are a few pictures of the evening where we all got to get dressed up and share a beautiful meal, fellowship and time of worship together:

Roomies!

A few of us, some staff, some Compassion DTS, and a lot of China Focused DTS!


This is Jessi! She is the leader of my school and is also my One or One person (I am being discipled by here). She is so wonderful and beautiful! (side note, it is hard to see but I was wearing the Toms from my Community back home to celebrate this wonderful evening!)


The room that we celebrated in! (Jericho) (side note: the guys head who is on the left bottom corner, Dean Sherman.. who spilled a glass of punch on me that night! It was a total accident but still it was a great memory!)

 
Chris and Marlyse! These 2 wonderful people will be tying the knot in Dec and I can’t wait to be there to celebrate with them! Marlyse is one of my roommates (as all of us girls live together) and she is such a joy and delight! Chris is just silly and wonderful! I enjoy taking pictures of them and asking them to make the faces they would make as if were their wedding day, this is what I got!


FOOD!!! So good! As you can tell it is mostly Asian food, but hey, when in Hong Kong….


Dean Sherman shared before we partook in a time of worship!


Some of the staff on base! (this was not a posed picture!)


Congrats Compassion DTS for shaking up the nations for the Cross! You guys are all wonderful!

Satan Came from Nebraska, so says Dean Sherman…

Dean Sherman spent a week with us, and what a joy he is! He is a great mix of humor and driving home a point about how valuable we all are for the Kingdom. Between telling us that Satan came from Nebraska (there are 3 people from Nebraska involved with my school: 2 students and 1 staff) or telling us to get the image of him in his Speedo out of our heads for quite times. He is a blessing to have and to learn from! He spent a few days talking about Spiritual Warfare and the other days talking about Relationships.
Something he said that hit me like a ton of bricks, a statement that seems so simple yet I have never realized it was a wrong thinking. He told us, “All Christians are not sinners saved by grace, they are Saints!” That means God seems me as a Saint!! What a joy that is, and once my thinking changed from being a SINNER saved... to being a SAINT, I can’t even tell you all the way I have viewed my life and my actions differently. I have finally realized that God doesn’t look down from Heaven and see me still covered in mud and dirt, I am not covered in darkness anymore, but I am a Saint.
The week that Dean was here I laid down a lot of the hurts and the lies that I have allowed myself to believe of my life. Many things that have been spoken over me not only as a child, but the things that my friends have called me, or authority figures who I trusted, other Christians who told me it was how God felt about my life. I have had a lot of hurts in my life and a lot of times where I wondered why in the world God would ever see me as clean. By the blood of the Lamb, I am clean and free from my bondage that I once allowed to tie me down! J