13 people together for 1 reason...

This is my family for the next 5 months (minus the staff memebers). We are 13 crazy people from 5 different countries (America, India, South Africa, New Zealand and Australia). We love to laugh together and we have enjoyed learning about each others countries and lives. Thank you Papa for this amazing, hand picked group of people that i get to walk through a life changing experiance with! I cant wait to get to know them all more and share in a great journey with them! :)

Perfect Love Casts out Fear...

“..What could I say? What could I do but offer this heart, oh God, completely to you…
I’ll stand, with arms high and heart abandoned, in awe of the One who gave it all
I’ll stand, my soul, Lord to you surrendered, all I am is Yours.”

The past few weeks I have been shown by Jesus how largely I walk with a fear of man. It is actually difficult to write about because I do not think I fully understand it yet.
I have been reminded of many verses about how silly it is to fear man, such as this one from Isaiah 51:12-16:
“I, even I, am the one who comforts you. So, who are you afraid of mere humans, who wither like the grass and disappear? Yet you have forgotten the Lord, your Creator, the one who put the stars in the sky and established the earth. Will you remain in constant dread of human oppression? Will you continue to fear the anger of your enemies from morning till night? Soon all you captives will be released! Imprisonment, starvation, and death will not be your fate! For I am the Lord your God, who stirs up the sea, causing its waves to roar. My name is the Lord Almighty. And I have put my words in your mouth and hidden you safely within my hand. I set all the stars in space and established the earth. I am the one who says to Israel, ‘You are mine!’”
Or in Job, when God places a challenge before Job asking him who established the world and gave it foundations? Who made the wild animals wild and gave the horse its mane? God wasn’t afraid to sit Job down and make sure he knew that he didn’t need to be in control.
It seems silly that God would need to give me such drastic stories to allow me to grasp the understanding that I have a fear of man. I also have experienced different situations the past few weeks that have allowed me to see more vividly my fears. God allowed me to break a fast in the beginning of the month, but I tried to tell him “no” because I didn’t want people to see me eating and be disappointed in me. I have also been able to see the ‘people pleaser’ in me and how often it will come out, even if it comes at a price of me feeling less than others.
God is in control! Why is that so hard for us to understand? I have been a Christian for 10 years this June, and I still have a hard time understanding that He isn’t going to mess up. He doesn’t make mistakes. His love is the only thing that is perfect in the world. Yet I still fight with thinking I know better at times, and I still get fearful of what others might think or say about me.
I have followed God to the other side of the world and the times people told me I was being selfish or doubted that this was really what God had for me this year, I didn’t listen to them. I trusted with all my heart that my Papa has asked me to come here for a reason. Praise His name, because my faith has been stretched in amazing ways; and I have seem real life miracles happen on the streets. I have been living out modern day Bible stories!
It is my hope and my prayer that God will keep breaking me of the fear of man. My faith is not for anyone else but me and my Papa. When he asks me to do something I want to do it because he asked me to, not because of what others might say. I pray that during my next phase of this year (DTS) that starts this week that I will be able to give my all to my Creator. So he makes all things good and I will sing praises to him for what he does in my life!

My God is not Dead, He's Surely Alive...

I got the opportunity earlier this week to go to Wan Chi, which is where one of 2 local red light districts is located. The one we went to is filled with clubs. A small group of us went to pray and worship on the streets to break the ground a bit before we go back later in the week. After a time of worship and crying out to God for this streets we were sitting upon I felt God saying, “Ask me and you shall receive.” So I did what he asked me to, I started praying for Heaven to collide with earth in amazing ways that we can’t do with our own power. I also prayed for people to say yes to Jesus and to see that he is beautiful and wonderful and everlasting. I cried out for those people with everything that in within me and declared the truth of the gospel over the people in the district. I don’t know if I have ever sat on a street and had my heart broken so deeply for people I didn’t even know. I asked Jesus to break my heart for what was breaking his, and just looking down the busy street… my heart was shattered.  I actually am sitting in my house in tears as I write about it, it was a heavy spirit and darkness covering the many streets in the district.
A few people felt God was asking us to go out and pray over the streets and maybe have a divine appointment if God set one before us. I started walking with 2 girls. We stood at one corner and just asked God to give us a few words of wisdom before we set out. I and Arianna got the color red, and to keep our eyes peeled for something or someone in red. We started walking and praying over the streets and all I felt like I could pray for was for the blood of Jesus to cover those streets and deliver the people. It is difficult walking down several large city blocks covered with back to back clubs. It is even harder when you see the faces of the girls who are forced into making that their life. A few times I had to pray to have the eyes and heart of Jesus, and to not look at them with shame. My heart was breaking for them, but at times I didn’t know how to look at them with an out pouring of love.
We had only a few minutes left before we had to meet back with our group when we came across a beautiful woman, Edith. She was sitting outside of Crazy Horse, one of the clubs, wearing a RED coat. We found out she had been working there for many years. She didn’t say it, but we knew that she was a “Madam” for the club, which is basically another name for an owner for the girls working there (aka pimp). She was soft spoken and seemed to just want to talk to someone. We asked her how business was going; she told us it was slow (PRAISE JESUS!). Then one of the girls I was with, Madeline, got a word of wisdom to ask her if she was having back pain. She told us she had back pain for several years, she assumed it was due to old age, and affirmed to us that she was in pain at that moment. She also told us that it was very difficult for her to stand up due to the pain that she was experiencing. We asked if we could pray for her because we believed our God could heal her, she agreed after asking how long it would take. I felt God telling me to place my hand on her shoulder and pray. All I knew to pray was “In Jesus name, heal this woman. Heal this woman. Heal this woman.” I repeated it over and over again. I declared it over here. After a few times of saying this out loud, I felt my hand heat up on her shoulder. We ended the prayer and asked her how she was feeling… no more pain! She was healed! Heaven and earth collided, just like I had asked!! SHE WAS HEALED!!! The holiness of out creator came down and through me and 2 other girls this woman is pain free!! PRAISE JESUS! She got right out of her chair and stretched and moved her back in all sorts of ways and with a smile told us she had no pain. She asked us how long until the pain came back and got to tell her that she would no longer ever feel that pain. Arianna then got to share the whole gospel with Edith. It was beautiful!
Never in my life have I seen a healing happen in front of me, let alone have I been the one God asked to heal someone! Oh Praise Jesus for his faithfulness!

New Heart for Worship…

I have been in Hong Kong for about a month now and my Papa is stirring up some great things within me. He has allowed me to see him in a new light and has brought old passions back to the surface. He has allowed me to press hard into him and see chains broken over my life/past. He has put his wonderful arms around me and comforted me while battles raged against me. He spoken to me almost daily and has set my soul on fire while giving me a new love for the Kingdom. He is good and sweet and beautiful!
One of our daily routines is to have worship for an hour each morning followed by a time of intersession. I have found these times to be the best 2 hours of my day! I get so filled up with the Spirit and covered in the love my Papa pours out upon me daily. There have also been days where I have had some hard conversations and hash out heart issues, and discuss my brokenness at times. Some days result in me not being able to stand still from excitement and other days I am humbled and find myself literally facedown asking/pleading with Papa to deliver me. In the past month I have had one reoccurring thought… What does it mean to worship?
I feel worship is different with each person. My Papa has had to walk with me a bit on this one to help me figure out what it looks like for me to worship him and bless him with all that is within me.
A few weeks ago, while singing in worship, I felt a distance and couldn’t seem to break through the darkness. I then got a picture that I believe was given to me from my Creator. It was a picture of me walking into a church and kneeling before the altar, closing my eyes, lifting my hands up high and singing with all my might. I felt Papa telling me, “Worship me like this. I gave you a voice that is wonderful to my ears, so honor me with it. I delight in the words you sing and the time you worship. Be humble. Be still and know that I hear you. Just sing what is on your heart child.”
I have also had a great desire within me to learn how to play the guitar while I am here. Today I kept getting images of me going back home and walking into my home church and just sitting on the altar while worshiping the lover of my soul! I have been praying hard about what these things me, and I feel that Papa is asking me to go home after this year is over and worship, without a fear of man. To walk into the doors and into a room full of people I know and allow Him to lead to worship as He desires of me. If that means getting raising my arms, kneeling down, or just being humbled enough to be facedown at the feet of Jesus and blessing him for what he has done for me… then I will do it!
This afternoon I came home, did some dishes, washed some clothes and sat down to journal and read. I kept coming back to the feeling of going home and worshiping. I then began to listen to some worship songs and soon found myself dancing around my house, singing at the top of my lungs with my arms stretched as high as they could go. At one point I had to put a pause on making my dinner because I was so overcome with joy and a desire to just close my eyes and jump around (I didn’t feel it was safe to do so while I held a very sharp knife in my hands). Long story short, I have a whole new heart for worship! I have noticed that I often get very distracted with what others think of me during worship. I have also become aware of how Papa has asked to worship him. I have discovered a new love for worship, which is crazy to imagine, since worship is my pathway to my Papa. It is wonderful just being overtaken with joy and a longing to express my love for my Lover.
A few songs that I have really gotten me excited lately are Phil Wickham’s song – You’re Beautiful. And also the David Crowder Band – Like a Lion. Both have amazing lyrics. I will leave you with a few of my favorite lines to sing loudly in my house. I truly believe and desire to speak/sing these words into life. Papa, would you allow Heaven to enter earth so these things would become our reality!

“Let love explode and bring the dead to life.
A love so bold, to bring a revolution somehow…
Let hope arise and make the darkness hide…
Now I’m lost in your freedom,
oh this world, I’ll overcome!

Let heaven roar
And fire fall
Come shake the ground
With the sound of REVIVAL!!

My God is not dead, he’s surely alive,
He’s living on the inside, roaring like a lion”
Like a Lion – David Crowder Band

“When we arrive at eternity’s shore,
when death is just a memory and tears are no more.
We’ll enter in as the wedding bells ring,
Your bride will come together and we’ll sing,
You’re Beautiful!”
You’re Beautiful – Phil Wickham   

Beatuy in the Valley...

This is how i spent my new year! :)