I pray that this next year God takes me to new places. That i wouldnt be fearful of what He is doing in my life or in the lives around me. I pray i would hold tightly to the robe of Jesus and that i would feel his comfort when i am weary. I pray that this next year i will stand on new and holy ground with the lover of my soul! I pray for the will of God to be done in my life this next year. That i would not be shaken.
Set a fire down in my soul that i cant contain, that i cant control...
I want more of you God!
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Fun Game to Play...
I have only played this once.. but it is a blast! What you do is watch the people walking by, and count how many of them are wearing Chucks for shoes... be prepared to count fast! Ready... Set... GO! Enjoy!
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
I am the new Mia Hamm...
I have finally played a few games of soccer, and God blessed me with playing in Hong Kong!! What a wonderfully fun time. The first game I ever played took place on top of a mountain, after we took a speed boat across part of the China Sea! It was beautiful. We did an outreach at a drug rehab center. I just wanted to share a few pictures and moments of my first game. Enjoy!!
This is a picture from the speed boat while we were crossing the China Sea.
Picking teams on the mountain.
Playing my very first game of soccer!
Our Outreach Team along with the boys at the drug rehab center.
The veiw from the rehab center. that is the China Sea and also the mountains of Hong Kong! Beautiful!
My Toms in the China Sea :)
My second game of soccer took place after a long (but blessed) day of outreaches. A few of us from our team went to a local soccer field in the village that the base is on. I (much to my surprise) was the first picked to be on a team!! That never happened when I was a kid, so I enjoyed someone wanting me on their team. It was during that game that I began to grasp the concept of how to play the game. Not once did I touch the ball with my hands. I also stunned the crowd (aka my teammates) with scoring my first ever goal!! I wish the moment was recorded for all to see, but if I could imagine my celebration, I would look like Mia Hamm! It was beautiful! My team leader, Tomasi, had to stop my celebration so we could continue the game. J proud moment in my life! and tonight at our game i made 3 goals!! i am kicking butt on the soccer field!
This is a picture from the speed boat while we were crossing the China Sea.
My second game of soccer took place after a long (but blessed) day of outreaches. A few of us from our team went to a local soccer field in the village that the base is on. I (much to my surprise) was the first picked to be on a team!! That never happened when I was a kid, so I enjoyed someone wanting me on their team. It was during that game that I began to grasp the concept of how to play the game. Not once did I touch the ball with my hands. I also stunned the crowd (aka my teammates) with scoring my first ever goal!! I wish the moment was recorded for all to see, but if I could imagine my celebration, I would look like Mia Hamm! It was beautiful! My team leader, Tomasi, had to stop my celebration so we could continue the game. J proud moment in my life! and tonight at our game i made 3 goals!! i am kicking butt on the soccer field!
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
You're Love Never Runs Out On Me...
Hello from beautiful Hong Kong!! I have arrived safe and sound and have hit the ground running. Such wonderful things have happened even in the few short days I have been here.
I was welcomed to the YWAM base by wonderful friends (those that I have known before arriving and others that I couldn’t wait to meet!) The first few nights were difficult due to jetlag, and even last night.. I slept for almost 12 hours (missing my first soccer game because of it.. which is a huge bummer.)
The food here is AMAZING!! The Chinese food we eat in America is nothing compared to how great Dim Sum is! Also at the base, they feed us very well! I have been eating 3 wonderful meals a day and even now I am snacking on some banana chips and craving the apples I have been storing up. I have tried many new things, some are wonderful. Others I have chosen not to eat again!
The people on the base are so wonderful! They are inviting and fun. I so look forward to getting to know them more throughout this next year.
I was welcomed to the YWAM base by wonderful friends (those that I have known before arriving and others that I couldn’t wait to meet!) The first few nights were difficult due to jetlag, and even last night.. I slept for almost 12 hours (missing my first soccer game because of it.. which is a huge bummer.)
The food here is AMAZING!! The Chinese food we eat in America is nothing compared to how great Dim Sum is! Also at the base, they feed us very well! I have been eating 3 wonderful meals a day and even now I am snacking on some banana chips and craving the apples I have been storing up. I have tried many new things, some are wonderful. Others I have chosen not to eat again!
The people on the base are so wonderful! They are inviting and fun. I so look forward to getting to know them more throughout this next year.
How am I doing? What has been stirring on my heart the past few days you ask?
The song lyrics that say “Our God is not dead, He’s surly alive. He’s living on the inside, roaring like a lion.” It has such truth to it! OUR GOD IS ALIVE!! He speaks. He loves. He is moving among us! I also believed that to be true, however the past few days God has opened my eyes to how real he is and how much he longs to be in conversation with each of us. Each day we have a time of worship and intersession in the mornings. (Those of you who know me, I LOVE worship, however intersession was one of the lowest on my list of spiritual gifts.) I always found it challenging to talk to someone who wasn’t there, or to wait for an answer when it didn’t come fast enough. While I have been in worship it feels as if the voice of God couldn’t be kept silenced. It’s an amazing moment to be filled with such love. The first day God was asking me things like, “Will you allow me to just be your Father? Will you allow me to just love you with all I have to give you? Will you let me be the God you dream of, rather than a God who has limits?” That day I left worship realizing I have put many limits on God and who he really is. I have compared my earthly father to the Creator of the world. I have compared the love of my earthly family to the indescribable love of my Savior.
The second day during worship we sang a song with the lyrics, “You’re love never fails. It never gives up. It never runs out on me.” It was in that moment that God came to me, as if he was sitting right next to me and said. “They (my family) have failed you. They have hurt you deeply at time. They have even given up on you. I won’t do that to you. I love you more then you will ever know. I delight in you. I smile when I see you and I sing songs over you. I am your creator. I am your friend. I will never forget you. You are mine. My love will never run out on you.” WOW! I can’t even tell you the emotion that I had hearing that. I so often seek to do good for God and all he was asking of me was to just allow him to love me. And that His love would NEVER run out. I was prayed over that day, and one thing that was spoken over me was, “This love is constant. It won’t go away after a little bit, God wants you to know that you will be loved for eternity.” I don’t know to even tell this without a smile on my face! My God sees me and loves me deeply! J
Today I was really struggling to come to the Lord. It felt that I was being held back by some force that I couldn’t recognize. After much prayer during worship God’s voice was finally heard, “You deserve to be here. You are here. I called you and I want you here for this moment. You deserve this. You can do this. You WILL do this.” God is moving! He is great and mighty.
I think these moments have been my highlight so far. I can hear God’s voice. We have a lecture about hearing God’s voice one of the first few days. It is truth! It is beautiful! Even during our times of intersession God is speaking.
What a beautiful and mighty Father we serve! Thank you Lord!
The second day during worship we sang a song with the lyrics, “You’re love never fails. It never gives up. It never runs out on me.” It was in that moment that God came to me, as if he was sitting right next to me and said. “They (my family) have failed you. They have hurt you deeply at time. They have even given up on you. I won’t do that to you. I love you more then you will ever know. I delight in you. I smile when I see you and I sing songs over you. I am your creator. I am your friend. I will never forget you. You are mine. My love will never run out on you.” WOW! I can’t even tell you the emotion that I had hearing that. I so often seek to do good for God and all he was asking of me was to just allow him to love me. And that His love would NEVER run out. I was prayed over that day, and one thing that was spoken over me was, “This love is constant. It won’t go away after a little bit, God wants you to know that you will be loved for eternity.” I don’t know to even tell this without a smile on my face! My God sees me and loves me deeply! J
Today I was really struggling to come to the Lord. It felt that I was being held back by some force that I couldn’t recognize. After much prayer during worship God’s voice was finally heard, “You deserve to be here. You are here. I called you and I want you here for this moment. You deserve this. You can do this. You WILL do this.” God is moving! He is great and mighty.
I think these moments have been my highlight so far. I can hear God’s voice. We have a lecture about hearing God’s voice one of the first few days. It is truth! It is beautiful! Even during our times of intersession God is speaking.
What a beautiful and mighty Father we serve! Thank you Lord!
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
12 days and counting...
My oh my.. how time does fly by!!
I wish i could just put into a short little blog how i feel about leaving in just a few days.. but i am speechess!!
**I have a Beautiful Savior who accepts me for who i am and where i am at, each and every moment.
**I have a wonderful Church Family who has supported me and believed in me and my calling.. even when i struggled to believe in myself.
**I have a Community of people who have chosen to fight with me in the journey of sharing the Good News of the Lord.
Thank you Lord for the way you cover me in love!
I wish i could just put into a short little blog how i feel about leaving in just a few days.. but i am speechess!!
**I have a Beautiful Savior who accepts me for who i am and where i am at, each and every moment.
**I have a wonderful Church Family who has supported me and believed in me and my calling.. even when i struggled to believe in myself.
**I have a Community of people who have chosen to fight with me in the journey of sharing the Good News of the Lord.
Thank you Lord for the way you cover me in love!
Saturday, November 5, 2011
T-minus 35 days...
It is getting down to the end of one season in my life, and onto another season in just a few short weeks.
Many parts of me long to stay in the USA longer. I dont want to leave certain relationships and things that i have on passions for here in the states. I want to stay comfortable with my surroundings. I do not want to face fears. I would like to stay "normal" in some senses.
Other parts of me just want to get on a plane tomorrow and get the heck out of here. Lets get to something new and unknown. Lets have a "new beginning". Let me do something crazy and learn great things in the process. I want to feel like i am being used for a great purpose and calling. I want to change this world.. and it starts with me leaving everything that i know.
At times i find myself being so torn. There are moments when i feel so used, discouraged, and trampled on and it makes me feel like the best option is to get out of here and move to something different until life settles down back home. And then there are moments when to leave brings tears to my eyes and hurts so much to imagine not sharing in the life of those who have invested in me for years.
God, may this be for you and not for me. I dont want to hang on to my selfish ways, rather just let me bless you with this life you have given me. Take those who are trying to destroy me out of my path and let me just run full speed at you and the plans you have for me. May you protect me from the enemy (mind, body and spirit). Would you be the only one i fix my eyes upon during these last few days. I have felt defeated at times and as if i have lost my way/direction in this journey. I know this has all been preparation for what is to come and would You give me a heart of understanding and to trust, with all my being, that you are in control. You know what i need. You can use me to do anything you want. Allow me to know that you have called me, and you desire me to do your work. You long to see me do great things and grow in my faith in wonderful ways. You see me.. even when no one else sees me. And you love me for where i am right now at this moment.. discouraged or not. You want me!! And with these 35 days left for me to be "comfy" may you be my desire, my heart, my soul, and my all. You alone, Jesus, are my hope and dream. Lets get out of this boat and walk on those waves. Amen.
Many parts of me long to stay in the USA longer. I dont want to leave certain relationships and things that i have on passions for here in the states. I want to stay comfortable with my surroundings. I do not want to face fears. I would like to stay "normal" in some senses.
Other parts of me just want to get on a plane tomorrow and get the heck out of here. Lets get to something new and unknown. Lets have a "new beginning". Let me do something crazy and learn great things in the process. I want to feel like i am being used for a great purpose and calling. I want to change this world.. and it starts with me leaving everything that i know.
At times i find myself being so torn. There are moments when i feel so used, discouraged, and trampled on and it makes me feel like the best option is to get out of here and move to something different until life settles down back home. And then there are moments when to leave brings tears to my eyes and hurts so much to imagine not sharing in the life of those who have invested in me for years.
God, may this be for you and not for me. I dont want to hang on to my selfish ways, rather just let me bless you with this life you have given me. Take those who are trying to destroy me out of my path and let me just run full speed at you and the plans you have for me. May you protect me from the enemy (mind, body and spirit). Would you be the only one i fix my eyes upon during these last few days. I have felt defeated at times and as if i have lost my way/direction in this journey. I know this has all been preparation for what is to come and would You give me a heart of understanding and to trust, with all my being, that you are in control. You know what i need. You can use me to do anything you want. Allow me to know that you have called me, and you desire me to do your work. You long to see me do great things and grow in my faith in wonderful ways. You see me.. even when no one else sees me. And you love me for where i am right now at this moment.. discouraged or not. You want me!! And with these 35 days left for me to be "comfy" may you be my desire, my heart, my soul, and my all. You alone, Jesus, are my hope and dream. Lets get out of this boat and walk on those waves. Amen.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Picture this Prep Time...
Take a look at this progress and the amazing people who have helped with my journey to Asia!
these are the peole who stepped in to help me build breakfast burritos:
these are the peole who stepped in to help me build breakfast burritos:
I was challenged to send Ellen an email asking if she would help me raise my funds.. so i did:
Much needed encouragement and details from Alli and Elise:
Said "goodbye" to Micheals Cantina to make time for more fundraising:
Selling "Alicia to Asia" bracelets as a fundraiser:
Garage Sale Fundraiser Total = $874!!! Yea!! we had some fun along the way with this one!
Breakfast Burrito Supplies:
Many coffee dates and engergy drinks have helped keep me going:
..along with a few margaritas:
And ALOT of Mexican food!! along with great times with Casey :)
I have had some crazy adventures:
Had to say some very difficult goodbyes:
And welcomed a few very precious new people into my life:
And thru it all God has allowed me to smile and learn how to be thankful for every step.
It has been a journey, to say the least. A journey that i wouldnt have any other way. God is teaching me so much already.. and im sure i will learn much much more!!!
Friday, September 2, 2011
Saturday, August 13, 2011
These Hard Times...
I have hidden my thoughts and feelings from many people during this past month to month and a half. I have been struggling to understand why the God of creation, who loves deeply, and has a tender heart towards His children.. would allow them to be so broken it hurts to even try to move.
I, along with my family, have lost some wonderful people in the past few months. People who lived greatly, and loved with all they had. People who loved nature and seeing things grow. People who longed for family time and wanted nothing more then share life with those around them.
My Grandpa left this earth on March 22, 2011. He was one of the greatest men i have ever had the honor of knowing... he gave the best, and i mean BEST hugs you could ever have. He loved his wife and kids. He would do anything for his grandkids and always had a twinkle in his eyes when he held his great grand babies for the first time. He was a farmer who worked for all he owned. He loved to play cards and he loved to win the card games. He told jokes and could always bring a room to smiles.. even on his final days. He fought so hard against the cancer.. but the cancer won. The last memory i have with my grandpa was going to see him a few weeks before he past.. and i told him i was going to Asia and i was going to work to tell people about Jesus. and with a soft voice that had been damaged over the years from many different health treatments, including radiation, he looked me in the eyes and said "I knew you would be amazing when you grew up. I couldnt be proud of you and cant wait to sit with Jesus and watch you do great things." He told me this as he held my hand so tightly and.. after those words he closed his eyes and fell back asleep.
I miss him so much. Almost everytime i think of him.. i cry. I hate knowing he is gone. He was such a great great man, and i dont know a people who could compair to how great Dale Bergman was in my life. He was such a fighter.. but knew he wanted to go to Jesus.
He was burried on a very cold and snowy day in March. I have yet to even go back to gave sight.. i know that seeing his name written on a stone is going to be so difficult to look at. I know i want to go, but i havent gotten the guts to just do it. God, i miss him so freaking much. I know he is not in pain anymore, and for the im so grateful.. but all i want is to hug him again. I just want to hold his hand one more time or have him pitch my side like he always did just to see me jump and laugh. He is the only Grandpa i have ever known.. and he is gone now.. and my heart breaks when i think of him not being here.
Joe and Dian were 2 people who loved to farm. They owned a farm in Wisconsin and knew their trade well. They had 3 wonderful, wonderful children. Dian was always one who was the leader of the pack at family events, if we needed more paper towels, she would tell the first person she bumped into to go and get more! she knew what she wanted/needed and knew just how to get it done. She was a quite person, i knew her my whole life and hardly ever talked to her about life or anything beyond "how are you?" but i know she was a lovely lady who loved her family deeply, and cared much for those in need. Joe was my mom oldest brother. He was identical to my grandpa when you looked at him. He too gave the best bear hugs in this world. He loved picking on people and showing them his love for them through his silly pranks. Many times he would invite people to come spend some time on the farm, and then would tell them all they would get to do all the jobs he didnt want to do, like cleaning up the cow poop, and milking the cows. You always knew when he called when a "yep...yep.. yep" would follow almost every comment you said. He loved, and i mean LOVED life. He did his job and did it well. He always wore a plaid botton up shirt and always kept a little note pad in the front pocket for "important info". He and Dian left such a void in many lives when they were killed on early morning in July 2, 2011. They went to visit life long friends for a conference in Minnesota. They were walks in at a Bed and Breakfast in New Ulm. That night.. a candle on the front porch of the building didnt get blown out.. and it caused a house fire. My Aunt Dian and Uncle Joe, along with their good friend Andy Uhing, and 3 others were killed that night as the building burnt down. I cant even tell you what news like that does to a family.. or a person. I still dont know how to process it. I dont like seeing fires anymore when i used to love camp fires.. now i just kind of stare at them and ask wonder how i could love something so dangerous.
The last time i saw Joe and Dian was at my Grandpa's funeral. I remember i looked at Joe from across the room and thought.. "thank God i can look at him and see Grandpa." and now.. i only have pictures of them both. I remember hugging him and when i had tears he comforted me and told me that we would get through this as a family. And Dian, she was doing the usual.. making sure everything was taken care of. She hardly sat down to chat with others. Before i left i did hug her and tell her i missed her and loved her and was so glad to have gotten to see her again.
They were taken from this world in such a tragic way.. and like i said i dont even have words to express the struggle i have had with it.
In the past few months.. i have almost stopped talking to God because im not sure what i am to say to him about all of this. This past week or so my ears were open to a song i have heard probably hundreds of times but i finally heard the words.
This really convays where my heart is right now. I need an answer and i need (want) a way out of this. I need faith to believe in these hard times...
Please pray for me as i am begining to really allow God into these places or hurt and brokeness. But also pray that i could be open, and vunerable with those closest to me and just let others know some of these areas as i prepare to go to Asia.
Monday, May 23, 2011
Once upon a time..
I once allowed my fear, and my weaknesses to control who i walked in this world..
I closed down and turned off any emotions that would cause me to be weak..
I ran from what i felt God was calling me towards..
I once hated change that was unexpected..
I turned away from people before they could hurt me.. even when all they wanted was to love me..
I once tasted Gods mercy, love, and grace.. and i left if behind so i could be in control..
Now, today.. i realize that with my weakness, my fears, my worries, doubts, insecurities, anger, tears.. with my human body that will never be good enough on it's own.. i will press into God with all that i have. I am not here to control my fate.. i have a will, and a path that was placed before me long ago, and a Savior who asked me to walk with him because he loves me deeply. He knows my weaknesses.. and he loves them. He sees my fears, and the tears i shed because of them.. and he loves me. He has watched me run and has allowed me to have space.. because he loves me. He has given me mercy and grace.. because he loves me.
So i stand now, with hardly any words to express the joy, peace, and honor to be able to serve a King who is the lover of my soul. No one else can ever love me like this! May i never love another more than i love my Lord!
I closed down and turned off any emotions that would cause me to be weak..
I ran from what i felt God was calling me towards..
I once hated change that was unexpected..
I turned away from people before they could hurt me.. even when all they wanted was to love me..
I once tasted Gods mercy, love, and grace.. and i left if behind so i could be in control..
Now, today.. i realize that with my weakness, my fears, my worries, doubts, insecurities, anger, tears.. with my human body that will never be good enough on it's own.. i will press into God with all that i have. I am not here to control my fate.. i have a will, and a path that was placed before me long ago, and a Savior who asked me to walk with him because he loves me deeply. He knows my weaknesses.. and he loves them. He sees my fears, and the tears i shed because of them.. and he loves me. He has watched me run and has allowed me to have space.. because he loves me. He has given me mercy and grace.. because he loves me.
So i stand now, with hardly any words to express the joy, peace, and honor to be able to serve a King who is the lover of my soul. No one else can ever love me like this! May i never love another more than i love my Lord!
Saturday, April 30, 2011
would you get out of the boat...
Today, i was pondering the story of Peter and Jesus. The one where Jesus asked Peter to get out of the boat and walk on water. Its a story i have pondered often in my past several years.. however today I encountered it in a new way.
I was sitting on a river bank, with a partly cloudy sky. Slight breeze on my face and such still soothing water. As i looked over the water while sitting in the sand, and my dog was wondering the banks behind me.. i thought.. "you know, it sure has been awhile since i have really heard the voice of God speak to me." Moments later.. its was very clear that God wanted to talk.
"Would you step out of the boat?" God asked me.
I looked at my surroundings again, the water was so still.. it almost seemed it was solid in spots. Hardly any waves. So i voiced my answer to the Creator of the World. "No." Yeah.. i told God no to what seems to be a very simple question.
"Why not?" was his responce...(Of course God wasnt going to take no for a final answer)
"I dont like water."
"Why are wont you trust me with the water?"
"Because i dont like water.. and altho this water seems really nice.. i just dont think i would enjoy being in the water.. Hey, Peter started to sink to if you might have forgot!!"
"What would it take for me to get you out of that boat?" God answered rather quickly.
"Well... convince me why i should get out of this." (im sooo daring when it comes to chatting with God sometimes.. Convince me.. WHO SAYS THAT TO GOD???)
"Freedom.."
"Well i like freedom."
"Peace.."
"I think i like that more than freedom.."
"Love.. I love you Alicia. Can you accept that?"
"Touche..." Yeah.. i also touche God sometimes.
"So i ask you again.. will you step out of the boat?" God asked me again.
"But... um.. in my boat.. there is control. i can control things in the boat.. so um.. maybe.?"
"You dont know it right now, but your boat has a hole in it.. and its sinking slowly. You are holding on to so much that isnt for you to hold to. It is for me to carry. Your boat is going to keep going downstream until you can hardly see me, and then it will sink. and you will have to swim back to me, upstream, and it wont be fun or easy. You will struggle and fight and cry and fear that you will not make it back to me.. when all you have to do is get out of the boat now, and walk just a few steps.. and I will carry you the rest of the way when you need me to." God has a way with words!
"That all sounds good.. and easy.. but i dont know how to set aside the worries of my day. I worry. alot! Heck.. you should know.. You were around when i was created!! but i struggle with that so often, and when i am not worried.. im worried that there is something i should be worried about!! so to step out of this boat..is to tell me to not worry.. and honestly i dont know how to really do that right now! and saying that.. makes me worried that im not going to EVER get this.."
i walked back to my car.. and everytime i looked at the water i heard the same voice that was calling to me before, "Will you step out of the boat?" and everytime.. i tried to avoid to the question, knowing that now i must answer it.
Will i step out of the boat?
I am a control freak. I want to know what is around the next corner, and what will happen if i answer yes, or no. I have tried to play the role of God in my life and I have failed at doing well at being God (because i am not him..)
Many of you who read this blog.. are those who have wanted to follow in my journey to Asia, and learn how you can be praying for me and celebrating with me. So i need some prayer on this one. I know i can i trust God with many thing.. (like the next year of my life in a country that i have never encountered) But i struggle to allow God to carry my load daily.. with simple things.
Would you pray that i would be able to step out of the boat before it sinks...?
I was sitting on a river bank, with a partly cloudy sky. Slight breeze on my face and such still soothing water. As i looked over the water while sitting in the sand, and my dog was wondering the banks behind me.. i thought.. "you know, it sure has been awhile since i have really heard the voice of God speak to me." Moments later.. its was very clear that God wanted to talk.
"Would you step out of the boat?" God asked me.
I looked at my surroundings again, the water was so still.. it almost seemed it was solid in spots. Hardly any waves. So i voiced my answer to the Creator of the World. "No." Yeah.. i told God no to what seems to be a very simple question.
"Why not?" was his responce...(Of course God wasnt going to take no for a final answer)
"I dont like water."
"Why are wont you trust me with the water?"
"Because i dont like water.. and altho this water seems really nice.. i just dont think i would enjoy being in the water.. Hey, Peter started to sink to if you might have forgot!!"
"What would it take for me to get you out of that boat?" God answered rather quickly.
"Well... convince me why i should get out of this." (im sooo daring when it comes to chatting with God sometimes.. Convince me.. WHO SAYS THAT TO GOD???)
"Freedom.."
"Well i like freedom."
"Peace.."
"I think i like that more than freedom.."
"Love.. I love you Alicia. Can you accept that?"
"Touche..." Yeah.. i also touche God sometimes.
"So i ask you again.. will you step out of the boat?" God asked me again.
"But... um.. in my boat.. there is control. i can control things in the boat.. so um.. maybe.?"
"You dont know it right now, but your boat has a hole in it.. and its sinking slowly. You are holding on to so much that isnt for you to hold to. It is for me to carry. Your boat is going to keep going downstream until you can hardly see me, and then it will sink. and you will have to swim back to me, upstream, and it wont be fun or easy. You will struggle and fight and cry and fear that you will not make it back to me.. when all you have to do is get out of the boat now, and walk just a few steps.. and I will carry you the rest of the way when you need me to." God has a way with words!
"That all sounds good.. and easy.. but i dont know how to set aside the worries of my day. I worry. alot! Heck.. you should know.. You were around when i was created!! but i struggle with that so often, and when i am not worried.. im worried that there is something i should be worried about!! so to step out of this boat..is to tell me to not worry.. and honestly i dont know how to really do that right now! and saying that.. makes me worried that im not going to EVER get this.."
i walked back to my car.. and everytime i looked at the water i heard the same voice that was calling to me before, "Will you step out of the boat?" and everytime.. i tried to avoid to the question, knowing that now i must answer it.
Will i step out of the boat?
I am a control freak. I want to know what is around the next corner, and what will happen if i answer yes, or no. I have tried to play the role of God in my life and I have failed at doing well at being God (because i am not him..)
Many of you who read this blog.. are those who have wanted to follow in my journey to Asia, and learn how you can be praying for me and celebrating with me. So i need some prayer on this one. I know i can i trust God with many thing.. (like the next year of my life in a country that i have never encountered) But i struggle to allow God to carry my load daily.. with simple things.
Would you pray that i would be able to step out of the boat before it sinks...?
Monday, April 18, 2011
lean not on me...
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart;
do not depend on your own understanding.
Seek his will in all you do,
and he will show you which path to take." Proverbs 3:5-6
I have heard, and read these verses many times in the past several years. I seemed to have skim over how powerful God's heart is in these verses. In the past 24 hours I have come to realize how deeply God desires for me to lean not on my own understandings of this world and in the wisdom i "Think" i have.
I dont have a roadmap for this life... so i cannot pick the right path that will lead me in a good direction on my own. I need a leader, i need a Savior. I need one who i can trust to lead me when i am blind and one who will carry me when i cannot walk on my own.
Many times i have had to lean (again) that my heart is not my own, and my life and not my own either. Going to India was planned before my first breath. Which means going to Asia has already been planned out as well.
If i trust with all my heart.. and lean not on me.. I will lead to the perfect path.
do not depend on your own understanding.
Seek his will in all you do,
and he will show you which path to take." Proverbs 3:5-6
I have heard, and read these verses many times in the past several years. I seemed to have skim over how powerful God's heart is in these verses. In the past 24 hours I have come to realize how deeply God desires for me to lean not on my own understandings of this world and in the wisdom i "Think" i have.
I dont have a roadmap for this life... so i cannot pick the right path that will lead me in a good direction on my own. I need a leader, i need a Savior. I need one who i can trust to lead me when i am blind and one who will carry me when i cannot walk on my own.
Many times i have had to lean (again) that my heart is not my own, and my life and not my own either. Going to India was planned before my first breath. Which means going to Asia has already been planned out as well.
If i trust with all my heart.. and lean not on me.. I will lead to the perfect path.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
News for the Jouney...
Support Letters have been written, stuffed, and sent!! Huge thank you for Casey Priebe for the encouragement he gave me that week of working on them! Also a huge thanks for the many times he got me ice cream and treats that week! :)
Support letters have been arriving back at my door!!! It has begun and it is so exciting!! :) Praise God for the way He has allowed others to respond!!
Fundraisers are in the works!!
April 16th: Pool Tournement @TnT Bar and Grill in Norfolk! starts at 1pm. 2 player teams, $20 per team to enter! (all proceeds to enter will go towards my Asia fund)
April 30th: Shuffle Board Turnement @ The Mint Bar in Norfolk.. Starts at 1pm. 2 player teams, $20 per team to enter! (all proceeds to enter go towards my Asia fund)
Also Tie-Dye T-Shirts have been being made!!! its going well.. and im still working on getting them all done! :) If you would like a shirt its $8 and i just need to know your size. If you live out of town and would like one they are $10 and i will ship them to you as well!! :)
Praise to God for the work he is doing! :) how exciting it is to serve and follow a God and a Savior who changes the world!!
Support letters have been arriving back at my door!!! It has begun and it is so exciting!! :) Praise God for the way He has allowed others to respond!!
Fundraisers are in the works!!
April 16th: Pool Tournement @TnT Bar and Grill in Norfolk! starts at 1pm. 2 player teams, $20 per team to enter! (all proceeds to enter will go towards my Asia fund)
April 30th: Shuffle Board Turnement @ The Mint Bar in Norfolk.. Starts at 1pm. 2 player teams, $20 per team to enter! (all proceeds to enter go towards my Asia fund)
Also Tie-Dye T-Shirts have been being made!!! its going well.. and im still working on getting them all done! :) If you would like a shirt its $8 and i just need to know your size. If you live out of town and would like one they are $10 and i will ship them to you as well!! :)
Praise to God for the work he is doing! :) how exciting it is to serve and follow a God and a Savior who changes the world!!
Sunday, March 20, 2011
..i will fight back
"My Savior, my God on High
The One who has brought me life
I surrender all that I am
Into your hands, I'm in your hands
Bless the Lord with all that's within o my soul
I cry out with all that I am make me whole
Here I stand I place all my hope in you
My Healer will see me through"
It has been some time since i have opened my heart and shared it with the Blogging world... so i suppose its time to catch you all up.
The word that comes to mind to discribe where I am at in this moment.. Attack.
Its not a pretty word, and its not a pretty moment if i looked at it with my human eyes, however through the eyes of my Creator.. its a beautiful picture. It is a sign of strength and courage. A moment of life and fighting a battle. A time of power and hunger.
To be attacked, its violent, and its painful.. I cannot honestly say i fully enjoy these moments while i am in them.. but i know the vital and powerful moments as well as joys that come from being attacked. I am such a danger that i must be distroyed! I am shaking the world in such a way that evil cannot stand to just sit back and watch me anymore. Satan, himself wants to take me down.. and im not going to just let me trip me and walk away.
If there is one thing i have learned about myself in the past several years it is this: I am a Fighter.
I do not like when people tell me i cant do something, or be someone. I hate being pushed into a corner, and i will fight back if you corner me. And I despise when i am told that i am not worth someone's time, or that a cause isn't worth fighting for.
I am so thankful and glad to serve a God who is fighting for me as i fight for Him. A Savior who sees past my many failures and frustrations, and extends love towards me. A King who would do anything for me and my heart. And a Lord to encourages me when i feel like i am down and out.. and saves me with words of wisdom and hope,
8 “But as for you, Israel my servant,
Jacob my chosen one,
descended from Abraham my friend,
9 I have called you back from the ends of the earth,
saying, ‘You are my servant.’
For I have chosen you
and will not throw you away.
10 Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.
Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.
11 “See, all your angry enemies lie there,
confused and humiliated.
Anyone who opposes you will die
and come to nothing.
12 You will look in vain
for those who tried to conquer you.
Those who attack you
will come to nothing.
13 For I hold you by your right hand—
I, the Lord your God.
And I say to you,
‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you.
14 Though you are a lowly worm, O Jacob,
don’t be afraid, people of Israel, for I will help you.
I am the Lord, your Redeemer.
I am the Holy One of Israel.’
15 You will be a new threshing instrument
with many sharp teeth.
You will tear your enemies apart,
making chaff of mountains.
16 You will toss them into the air,
and the wind will blow them all away;
a whirlwind will scatter them.
Then you will rejoice in the Lord.
You will glory in the Holy One of Israel."
Isaiah 41:8-16
The One who has brought me life
I surrender all that I am
Into your hands, I'm in your hands
Bless the Lord with all that's within o my soul
I cry out with all that I am make me whole
Here I stand I place all my hope in you
My Healer will see me through"
It has been some time since i have opened my heart and shared it with the Blogging world... so i suppose its time to catch you all up.
The word that comes to mind to discribe where I am at in this moment.. Attack.
Its not a pretty word, and its not a pretty moment if i looked at it with my human eyes, however through the eyes of my Creator.. its a beautiful picture. It is a sign of strength and courage. A moment of life and fighting a battle. A time of power and hunger.
To be attacked, its violent, and its painful.. I cannot honestly say i fully enjoy these moments while i am in them.. but i know the vital and powerful moments as well as joys that come from being attacked. I am such a danger that i must be distroyed! I am shaking the world in such a way that evil cannot stand to just sit back and watch me anymore. Satan, himself wants to take me down.. and im not going to just let me trip me and walk away.
If there is one thing i have learned about myself in the past several years it is this: I am a Fighter.
I do not like when people tell me i cant do something, or be someone. I hate being pushed into a corner, and i will fight back if you corner me. And I despise when i am told that i am not worth someone's time, or that a cause isn't worth fighting for.
I am so thankful and glad to serve a God who is fighting for me as i fight for Him. A Savior who sees past my many failures and frustrations, and extends love towards me. A King who would do anything for me and my heart. And a Lord to encourages me when i feel like i am down and out.. and saves me with words of wisdom and hope,
8 “But as for you, Israel my servant,
Jacob my chosen one,
descended from Abraham my friend,
9 I have called you back from the ends of the earth,
saying, ‘You are my servant.’
For I have chosen you
and will not throw you away.
10 Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.
Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.
11 “See, all your angry enemies lie there,
confused and humiliated.
Anyone who opposes you will die
and come to nothing.
12 You will look in vain
for those who tried to conquer you.
Those who attack you
will come to nothing.
13 For I hold you by your right hand—
I, the Lord your God.
And I say to you,
‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you.
14 Though you are a lowly worm, O Jacob,
don’t be afraid, people of Israel, for I will help you.
I am the Lord, your Redeemer.
I am the Holy One of Israel.’
15 You will be a new threshing instrument
with many sharp teeth.
You will tear your enemies apart,
making chaff of mountains.
16 You will toss them into the air,
and the wind will blow them all away;
a whirlwind will scatter them.
Then you will rejoice in the Lord.
You will glory in the Holy One of Israel."
Isaiah 41:8-16
Monday, March 7, 2011
for Your Kingdom's cause...
"Break my heart of what breaks yours..."
I love that I serve a Savior who is unafraid of my heart. He embraces the mess that i feel covers my life. He comforts my fears. I am walking through life, and the Creator of the Universe.. and He loves me!!
When it feels like many have turned their backs, and shut down their hearts.. I have a Savior, a King, a Worrior.. who loves me!!
God is love!!
I love that I serve a Savior who is unafraid of my heart. He embraces the mess that i feel covers my life. He comforts my fears. I am walking through life, and the Creator of the Universe.. and He loves me!!
When it feels like many have turned their backs, and shut down their hearts.. I have a Savior, a King, a Worrior.. who loves me!!
God is love!!
Sunday, February 20, 2011
God who answers prayer...
Verse 1:
God who answers prayer
Sees me in my need
Runs to my despair
Your promise I believe
Pre-Chorus:
That You Are, You Are, You Are God
Chorus:
Bless the Lord with all that's within o my soul
I cry out with all that I am make me whole
Here I stand I place all my hope in you
My Healer will see me through
Verse 2:
God who answers prayer
Faithful you will be
In my darkest hour
Your promise I believe
Bridge:
My Savior, my God on High
The One who has brought me life
I surrender all that I am
Into your hands, I'm in your hands
God who answers prayer
Sees me in my need
Runs to my despair
Your promise I believe
Pre-Chorus:
That You Are, You Are, You Are God
Chorus:
Bless the Lord with all that's within o my soul
I cry out with all that I am make me whole
Here I stand I place all my hope in you
My Healer will see me through
Verse 2:
God who answers prayer
Faithful you will be
In my darkest hour
Your promise I believe
Bridge:
My Savior, my God on High
The One who has brought me life
I surrender all that I am
Into your hands, I'm in your hands
This is a song that the worship band at my chruch just did this Sunday and granted i wasnt there.. but it was shared with me.
I am on new ground, and this ground is rocky and scary.. but hopeful at the same time. There are many tears that cover this ground, and a heart that feels like it is falling apart everytime it beats.
Im not even standing on this gound.. i cant seem to find the strength to stand on it.. Im not ready to be on this ground. I knew it was going to have to be on it at some point, but i dont want right now.. i dont want to have to sit and wait on this ground to change. I know what it will take for this to change.. and im not ready to do that either.
I know you are ready.. and i know Jesus cant wait to see you face to face.. and i dont want you to suffer anymore.. but i love you and its hard to me to just hand you over to Jesus right now. I just want you to be healed.. and stay around..
i guess thats why this song brings me to tears.. its everything i want to tell God but cant seem to find the words to tell him...
Faithful you will be
In my darkest hour
Your promise I believe
Bless the Lord with all that's within o my soul
I cry out with all that I am make me whole
Here I stand I place all my hope in you
My Healer will see me through"
I love you grandpa..
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Support letter...
Hello! Hope this letter finds you doing well. As many of you remember in November 2009, I went to
India for my second trip. While I was there I became aware of all the oppression that takes place in this world. A nine year old boy, Kishore, who was living in an orphanage, was the one who both encouraged me and broke my heart with the weight of his struggles when he shared a small piece of his heart with me. I had only met Kishore hours before he told be these words, “I will never forget you because you loved me tonight.” To this day I can see the look in the eyes of an innocent young man, along with the devastation and hope that he carried for someone, even if it was an American, to spend a few hours with him.
It is because of this young man, and a calling from God, that I am going to be taking in an amazing journey to Asia. I am joining a group called Youth With A Mission (YWAM) and will be spending a year traveling and sharing the Gospel with many people who have never heard the name of Jesus. During my year I will partake in three different programs with YWAM. The first is Christmas Outreach (COR). This is a two week outreach to share the Gospel in Hong Kong with drama, dance to share the good news of Christ.
Second is a Discipleship Training School (DTS). This is a five month program in which I will spend three months in a lecture phase in Hong Kong with experienced teachers from all around the world. They will teach on subjects such as hearing the voice of God, prayer and intercession, worship, evangelism, world missions, along with many others. The next two months will be outreach in Mainland China, I will take what I have learned during the lecture phase and share God’s love with those all around me.
Finally, the last five months will be spent with a Far East Evangelism Team (FEET). I will have a short preparation time in Hong Kong, which will be followed by about four months of outreach. I will travel to three to five countries in Asia using eye catching dramas and dances to capture the attention of villagers.
This is a journey of a lifetime, and it is a dream of mine to pursue the passion and heart I have for serving, loving, and walking with others around the world. I would ask for you to partner with me in this adventure in a few ways. First, join with me with your prayers. Not only prayer for the year that I will spend in Asia, but also in the months of preparation before I travel to the other side of the world. Please be praying for health, safety, finances and also for God’s will and heart to be known by all those I encounter during this journey.
Second, if you feel led to give financially towards my trip you can certainly do so by writing a check to Grace Community and putting “Alicia Patterson” on the memo line. Then mail all donations to me at: Alicia Patterson
205 South 10th Street
Norfolk, NE 68701
I look forward to sharing in this experience with all of you and I cannot wait to see what God has planned for me with this journey! Thanks for helping change the world with me and my Savior.
In His Name (Isaiah 1:17),
Alicia Patterson
India for my second trip. While I was there I became aware of all the oppression that takes place in this world. A nine year old boy, Kishore, who was living in an orphanage, was the one who both encouraged me and broke my heart with the weight of his struggles when he shared a small piece of his heart with me. I had only met Kishore hours before he told be these words, “I will never forget you because you loved me tonight.” To this day I can see the look in the eyes of an innocent young man, along with the devastation and hope that he carried for someone, even if it was an American, to spend a few hours with him.
It is because of this young man, and a calling from God, that I am going to be taking in an amazing journey to Asia. I am joining a group called Youth With A Mission (YWAM) and will be spending a year traveling and sharing the Gospel with many people who have never heard the name of Jesus. During my year I will partake in three different programs with YWAM. The first is Christmas Outreach (COR). This is a two week outreach to share the Gospel in Hong Kong with drama, dance to share the good news of Christ.
Second is a Discipleship Training School (DTS). This is a five month program in which I will spend three months in a lecture phase in Hong Kong with experienced teachers from all around the world. They will teach on subjects such as hearing the voice of God, prayer and intercession, worship, evangelism, world missions, along with many others. The next two months will be outreach in Mainland China, I will take what I have learned during the lecture phase and share God’s love with those all around me.
Finally, the last five months will be spent with a Far East Evangelism Team (FEET). I will have a short preparation time in Hong Kong, which will be followed by about four months of outreach. I will travel to three to five countries in Asia using eye catching dramas and dances to capture the attention of villagers.
This is a journey of a lifetime, and it is a dream of mine to pursue the passion and heart I have for serving, loving, and walking with others around the world. I would ask for you to partner with me in this adventure in a few ways. First, join with me with your prayers. Not only prayer for the year that I will spend in Asia, but also in the months of preparation before I travel to the other side of the world. Please be praying for health, safety, finances and also for God’s will and heart to be known by all those I encounter during this journey.
Second, if you feel led to give financially towards my trip you can certainly do so by writing a check to Grace Community and putting “Alicia Patterson” on the memo line. Then mail all donations to me at: Alicia Patterson
205 South 10th Street
Norfolk, NE 68701
I look forward to sharing in this experience with all of you and I cannot wait to see what God has planned for me with this journey! Thanks for helping change the world with me and my Savior.
In His Name (Isaiah 1:17),
Alicia Patterson
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Love is...
... patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud
or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.
It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance."
I Cor. 13: 4-7
Its about time i get back to some basics in how i look at things, and look at God. I need to learn how to love. because as i look at what Love really is.. im not loving the way i should be. There are many relationships that i have demanded my way, and not allowed others to experiance life on their own. And I have been jealous.. very jealous in other relationships. I have given up more times then i can count. I have lost faith in others. And i have kept a long list of wrongs done against me..
Its time i get back to understanding that to love, is to be in a very dangerous place. however with the God that i serve.. he is big enough to handle any dangers i face!
My God is big enough to love me, and to break down my walls i have build around my heart. And my God is big enough to rebuild the damage that my heart has experianced. and my God is certainly big enough to teach me how to love with a heart that is fully loved by a King.
or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.
It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance."
I Cor. 13: 4-7
Its about time i get back to some basics in how i look at things, and look at God. I need to learn how to love. because as i look at what Love really is.. im not loving the way i should be. There are many relationships that i have demanded my way, and not allowed others to experiance life on their own. And I have been jealous.. very jealous in other relationships. I have given up more times then i can count. I have lost faith in others. And i have kept a long list of wrongs done against me..
Its time i get back to understanding that to love, is to be in a very dangerous place. however with the God that i serve.. he is big enough to handle any dangers i face!
My God is big enough to love me, and to break down my walls i have build around my heart. And my God is big enough to rebuild the damage that my heart has experianced. and my God is certainly big enough to teach me how to love with a heart that is fully loved by a King.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
looking for ideas/help...
Well it has been less than 24 hours since i found out that i was officially accepted to be apart of the Youth With A Mission, Year in Asia program. and so the journey begins!
For those of you who do not know at all what I am talking about, here is a little filling in!
I and going to go spend a year in, well, Asia! I will be learning alot about God's heart for the nations, and for me. I will get a chance to go out many times in that year and share the Good News in many different countries! Its an amazing opportunity and I (at this moment) still have few words to explaine how excited i am to partake in this journey!!
Now i have the skills to go, and i have been called to go on this wonderful trip. However there are other skills that i do not have that i will need to preperation to this trip. Those skills involve being EXTRA creative!! i need to come up with a few fund raisers.. and im not creative and im not got at hammering out details. (i would like to think im good at details.. but i have accepted that i am not skilled in this area). So i would love to walk along side anyone who would be willing to help with some fund raising, but i need some help or ideas that any of you may have.
There is one fund raiser that is "in the works" and with that.. i need a few supplies!! i need 3 peices of plywood that would be big enough to cover a pool table. (3 pool tables need covered with 1 piece of plywood each.) and i know i dont have any plywood.. so i need some help with that too!!
Um.. also addresses. Im in the works of writting support letters and letters to let everyone know how i can keep in contact with all of you, i need addresses/email addresses so that i can let all of you who are interested informed throughout this year and the year that i am traveling.
This is also the address for the blog that i will be using as well while i am gone. it will be used for my highlights and details while i am overseas. please feel free to follow me and take part in thei journey with me!!
Thanks everyone and cant wait to tell you more. (if you have any questions please feel free to ask!!)
For those of you who do not know at all what I am talking about, here is a little filling in!
I and going to go spend a year in, well, Asia! I will be learning alot about God's heart for the nations, and for me. I will get a chance to go out many times in that year and share the Good News in many different countries! Its an amazing opportunity and I (at this moment) still have few words to explaine how excited i am to partake in this journey!!
Now i have the skills to go, and i have been called to go on this wonderful trip. However there are other skills that i do not have that i will need to preperation to this trip. Those skills involve being EXTRA creative!! i need to come up with a few fund raisers.. and im not creative and im not got at hammering out details. (i would like to think im good at details.. but i have accepted that i am not skilled in this area). So i would love to walk along side anyone who would be willing to help with some fund raising, but i need some help or ideas that any of you may have.
There is one fund raiser that is "in the works" and with that.. i need a few supplies!! i need 3 peices of plywood that would be big enough to cover a pool table. (3 pool tables need covered with 1 piece of plywood each.) and i know i dont have any plywood.. so i need some help with that too!!
Um.. also addresses. Im in the works of writting support letters and letters to let everyone know how i can keep in contact with all of you, i need addresses/email addresses so that i can let all of you who are interested informed throughout this year and the year that i am traveling.
This is also the address for the blog that i will be using as well while i am gone. it will be used for my highlights and details while i am overseas. please feel free to follow me and take part in thei journey with me!!
Thanks everyone and cant wait to tell you more. (if you have any questions please feel free to ask!!)
Saturday, February 12, 2011
im not good enough..
Ephesians 2:8-10 (New Living Translation)
8 God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. 9 Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. 10 For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
Satan has been knocking at me hard lately, with family and different stresses. I sent out a text to a few good friends tonight telling them about my news from YWAM and one of them, a very wise friend responded with, "Im not suprised."
And i told them with something like this, "...I was alittle worried that i wasnt going to be good enought for the program.."
And their response was, "your not good enough Ehp 2:8-10"
Touche... im not good enough.
God doesnt call the qualified.. He qualifies the called.
this just in...
I HAVE BEEN ACCEPTED INTO THE YEAR IN ASIA PROGRAM!!!
estimated time of arrival in Hong Kong: Dec 10, 2011
Holy Moley!!! i dont even have words right now.. but AMEN!!! AMEN AMEN AMEN!!!
okay... i need to settle down and get some rest!!
but once again.. AMEN!!!
estimated time of arrival in Hong Kong: Dec 10, 2011
Holy Moley!!! i dont even have words right now.. but AMEN!!! AMEN AMEN AMEN!!!
okay... i need to settle down and get some rest!!
but once again.. AMEN!!!
Friday, February 11, 2011
question the unknown...
Why me..?
Why Asia..?
Heck, why missions..??
Why do something that others seem to rip apart my hopes..??
Why the world..??
Why the people who have never heard..??
Why a year..??
Why now..??
Why this, and not that..??
Will i be missed, or will i be the one missing..??
What happens if would told you no..??
What happens if You say no..??
What if i allow them to bring me down..??
What will be happening at this moment in one year..??
What am i doing..??
Is this in Your plan, or just another thing i "think" You are telling me to do..??
Why am i questioning you so much the past few days..??
Why do i get shaken by words of the world.. rather then cling to words from the Kingdom..??
Why is this scarier and crazier then i imagined it would be..??
Why do i not feel prepared..??
Why am i not just jumpin in with both feet..??
Why do i question what i know is of You..??
What happens when we change the world...??
Then what happens to me.. to us.. to our relationship..??
What happens once i follow you with all i have..??
What joys will be face..?? What sorrows..??
What things do you have waiting for me in this choice..??
What will my heart feel..??
What will this world do once we shake it...??
Why Asia..?
Heck, why missions..??
Why do something that others seem to rip apart my hopes..??
Why the world..??
Why the people who have never heard..??
Why a year..??
Why now..??
Why this, and not that..??
Will i be missed, or will i be the one missing..??
What happens if would told you no..??
What happens if You say no..??
What if i allow them to bring me down..??
What will be happening at this moment in one year..??
What am i doing..??
Is this in Your plan, or just another thing i "think" You are telling me to do..??
Why am i questioning you so much the past few days..??
Why do i get shaken by words of the world.. rather then cling to words from the Kingdom..??
Why is this scarier and crazier then i imagined it would be..??
Why do i not feel prepared..??
Why am i not just jumpin in with both feet..??
Why do i question what i know is of You..??
What happens when we change the world...??
Then what happens to me.. to us.. to our relationship..??
What happens once i follow you with all i have..??
What joys will be face..?? What sorrows..??
What things do you have waiting for me in this choice..??
What will my heart feel..??
What will this world do once we shake it...??
Sunday, February 6, 2011
i dare you to abandon me..
i have been thinking a lot lately about the meaning of "family".
Family:
1:
a. a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head : household.
2:
b. a group of things related by common characteristics
When in debt google it! Growing up I figured the meaning of "family" was
1. a group of people who get pleasure out of down-grading one in order to overpower another.
2. a group of people who endure verbal and at times phyiscal abuse as a sign of affection.
3. a emotional roller coaster, that must be held in and shown to no one, especally those who live under the same roof.
4. only associated by living conditions.
5. fake.
6. lies.
7. a group of people that will treat others harshly, and damage those they are said to "care the most about".
im other words.. family.. is a hard word for me. I have struggled with the meaning of what a family really is, and what it really means. Which has led me to this..
"Even if my father and mother abandon me,
the Lord will hold me close.
Teach me how to live, O Lord.
Lead me along the right path,
for my enemies are waiting for me." Psalm 27:10-11
My next thought after being brought to this passage, "holy..." and by holy, i mean i was, and still am speechless. I have read this verse many times before. i have read, and listened to messages about the Body of Christ being family. but right now, in my journey.. i have never really realized how impacted i am by my family (my flesh and blood..) and how i try to impress them, and give them something to be proud of me for. However, it is the Body of Christ family that has the BEST intrest in mind for me, and my heart. And above all.. Christ himself gave all of himself so that i may live, and i rarely look to him as family, just a leader.
God wants me to have such an intimate relationship with him and i often.. usually put that relationship on the back burner. This year, if i had to pick one word that i really feel God has called me to, it is "Relationship." when this word came to my mind, i was so focused on getting to Asia and spending a year not looking back, then God stopped me. He wants me to love those around me, he wants me to go and serve, and to learn to be served at times. God wants me to understand His heart for the nations, the lost, the sick, the weak, and the ones who need to be loved for the first time in their life. God wants me to enter into sometime big, something great, something powerful and unknowing. God wants me to step into a better understanding of himself and his heart for me. God wants and has called me.. yet i just think its another "something" i must do..God doesnt need me to do anything! he only wants my heart.. even simpler then that.. he wants me!
God just wants to talk with me.. and the thing that holds me back from that the most is.. as you could probably guess. my family!
Today i was in church i was reading ahead a bit, and i read Psalm 27.
5 For he will conceal me there when troubles come;
he will hide me in his sanctuary.
He will place me out of reach on a high rock.
6 Then I will hold my head high
above my enemies who surround me.
At his sanctuary I will offer sacrifices with shouts of joy,
singing and praising the Lord with music.
Family:
1:
a. a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head : household.
2:
b. a group of things related by common characteristics
When in debt google it! Growing up I figured the meaning of "family" was
1. a group of people who get pleasure out of down-grading one in order to overpower another.
2. a group of people who endure verbal and at times phyiscal abuse as a sign of affection.
3. a emotional roller coaster, that must be held in and shown to no one, especally those who live under the same roof.
4. only associated by living conditions.
5. fake.
6. lies.
7. a group of people that will treat others harshly, and damage those they are said to "care the most about".
im other words.. family.. is a hard word for me. I have struggled with the meaning of what a family really is, and what it really means. Which has led me to this..
"Even if my father and mother abandon me,
the Lord will hold me close.
Teach me how to live, O Lord.
Lead me along the right path,
for my enemies are waiting for me." Psalm 27:10-11
My next thought after being brought to this passage, "holy..." and by holy, i mean i was, and still am speechless. I have read this verse many times before. i have read, and listened to messages about the Body of Christ being family. but right now, in my journey.. i have never really realized how impacted i am by my family (my flesh and blood..) and how i try to impress them, and give them something to be proud of me for. However, it is the Body of Christ family that has the BEST intrest in mind for me, and my heart. And above all.. Christ himself gave all of himself so that i may live, and i rarely look to him as family, just a leader.
God wants me to have such an intimate relationship with him and i often.. usually put that relationship on the back burner. This year, if i had to pick one word that i really feel God has called me to, it is "Relationship." when this word came to my mind, i was so focused on getting to Asia and spending a year not looking back, then God stopped me. He wants me to love those around me, he wants me to go and serve, and to learn to be served at times. God wants me to understand His heart for the nations, the lost, the sick, the weak, and the ones who need to be loved for the first time in their life. God wants me to enter into sometime big, something great, something powerful and unknowing. God wants me to step into a better understanding of himself and his heart for me. God wants and has called me.. yet i just think its another "something" i must do..God doesnt need me to do anything! he only wants my heart.. even simpler then that.. he wants me!
God just wants to talk with me.. and the thing that holds me back from that the most is.. as you could probably guess. my family!
Today i was in church i was reading ahead a bit, and i read Psalm 27.
Psalm 27
A psalm of David.
1 The Lord is my light and my salvation—
so why should I be afraid?
The Lord is my fortress, protecting me from danger,
so why should I tremble?
so why should I be afraid?
The Lord is my fortress, protecting me from danger,
so why should I tremble?
(i have fears of rejection, and of being hated and abandoned. I have fears of not being good enough, and of not making my family proud. And God wants me.. He wants to protect me.. and He doesnt want me to fear anything, because He wants to be my strength.)
2 When evil people come to devour me,
when my enemies and foes attack me,
they will stumble and fall.
3 Though a mighty army surrounds me,
my heart will not be afraid.
Even if I am attacked,
I will remain confident.
2 When evil people come to devour me,
when my enemies and foes attack me,
they will stumble and fall.
3 Though a mighty army surrounds me,
my heart will not be afraid.
Even if I am attacked,
I will remain confident.
(I dont think i have this one in the bag quite yet.. but i want to work on it. I want to come to the understanding that even when the world feels like it is crashing down around me, that i shall not fear! i know God sees me as so much more than i see me, and i want to come to the understand thru God, that i can stand in the shadow of the valley of death, and not fear evil for Christ stands with me!)
4 The one thing I ask of the Lord—
the thing I seek most—
is to live in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
delighting in the Lord’s perfections
and meditating in his Temple.
the thing I seek most—
is to live in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
delighting in the Lord’s perfections
and meditating in his Temple.
(To love the Lord with all my heart, soul, mind and strength! better is one day in the Courts of God! God is perfect, and he creates perfectly! I often doubt Gods perfection, because i dont see how i could be perfect.. but to this world im not, to God, the Creator.. i am Beautiful, and perfect in His sight.)
5 For he will conceal me there when troubles come;
he will hide me in his sanctuary.
He will place me out of reach on a high rock.
6 Then I will hold my head high
above my enemies who surround me.
At his sanctuary I will offer sacrifices with shouts of joy,
singing and praising the Lord with music.
( Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. 9 Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. 10 That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2. Cor 12:8-10.... Enough prove there)
9 Do not turn your back on me.
Do not reject your servant in anger.
You have always been my helper.
Don’t leave me now; don’t abandon me,
O God of my salvation!
7 Hear me as I pray, O Lord.
Be merciful and answer me!
8 My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.”
And my heart responds, “Lord, I am coming.”
Be merciful and answer me!
8 My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.”
And my heart responds, “Lord, I am coming.”
(my hearts desire is to meet with God and talk with him.. actually talk and have a converstation.. not just have a one-sided converstation with myself..)
9 Do not turn your back on me.
Do not reject your servant in anger.
You have always been my helper.
Don’t leave me now; don’t abandon me,
O God of my salvation!
(I know i have begged God is this one before.. my biggest fear is being abandoned.. and there were times when i have felt i dont deserve all that God has given me.. but there are also times that i have felt i have done such wrong, that God will turn his back on me. I know that God wont leave me nor forsake me, but i know i have pled my case with God just like David is doing in this verse.)
10 Even if my father and mother abandon me,
the Lord will hold me close.
the Lord will hold me close.
11 Teach me how to live, O Lord.
Lead me along the right path,
for my enemies are waiting for me.
Lead me along the right path,
for my enemies are waiting for me.
(This is right, exactally where my heart is right now with my family. I feel as tho they dont understand where i am at, and why it is that i want to pursue following Christ.. however i still fear being abandoned. Then i read that even if that were to happen.. the Lord will STILL hold me.. how amazing of a picture is that!? even if my "family" leaves me.. i still have the Lord.. i STILL have SOMEONE!)
12 Do not let me fall into their hands.
For they accuse me of things I’ve never done;
with every breath they threaten me with violence.
13 Yet I am confident I will see the Lord’s goodness
while I am here in the land of the living.
For they accuse me of things I’ve never done;
with every breath they threaten me with violence.
13 Yet I am confident I will see the Lord’s goodness
while I am here in the land of the living.
14 Wait patiently for the Lord.
Be brave and courageous.
Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.
Be brave and courageous.
Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.
(okay. im not good at being patient. but i do know that i can wait on the Lord knowing that he wants me, and he wants to be with me! And by knowing these things.. and putting aside the worries of my day, Christ will meet with me!)
I know i have some heart issues to work thru.. and the first is knowing that i need not worry about family. Christ will provide even if i am abandoned. He loves me so much more then i can ever understand.
God- my life isnt mine.. and i struggle with that, however i know that you see me as much more then i see myself as. You have called me to be a missionary, and for years i have fought you in that, yet i stand in your presence knowing.. that i am to be a missionary. I came back to the foot of the cross and put down my life, my struggles, and my fears (for the most part) and looked at my life thru your eyes.. will you now help me, and allow me to continue to see my life thru your eyes, and allow me to know and understand more and more each and everyday another part of your heart and your character. you love me, and i am so thankful to know that i have a father, a brother, a husband, and leader in you! thank you being you and being great and not abandoning me...amen
I know i have some heart issues to work thru.. and the first is knowing that i need not worry about family. Christ will provide even if i am abandoned. He loves me so much more then i can ever understand.
God- my life isnt mine.. and i struggle with that, however i know that you see me as much more then i see myself as. You have called me to be a missionary, and for years i have fought you in that, yet i stand in your presence knowing.. that i am to be a missionary. I came back to the foot of the cross and put down my life, my struggles, and my fears (for the most part) and looked at my life thru your eyes.. will you now help me, and allow me to continue to see my life thru your eyes, and allow me to know and understand more and more each and everyday another part of your heart and your character. you love me, and i am so thankful to know that i have a father, a brother, a husband, and leader in you! thank you being you and being great and not abandoning me...amen
Friday, February 4, 2011
As i sit and wait..
Today is the morning that my cell phone alarm woke me up at 7:30, singing "Im not alright..". Once that alarm rang and i realized i needed to get out of bed, let the dog outside, feed the dog, find a way to remove to morning voice from myself, and sit down with a cup of green tea.. and wait.
What am i waiting for??
A phone call... a phone "interview" of sorts. a moment, a time, and a story that could be what changes my life!
I am waiting for a phone call from the YWAM Hong Kong base. i dont believe they have recieved my application quite yet, but i have been waiting for this call for a little less then 2 weeks. I dont think it will be hard for me to set on the phone and tell someone pretty much everything that i wrote out on myapplication a few weeks ago.
The phone call didnt come in this morning. which is okay, at first i was a little upset, because i missed the phone call last night.. however this moning i know that things can be reschedualed, and that i am working with a country on the other side of the world! i must wait.. and take a few breaths. i can do this! i will do this!
I know what God has called me to.. and i know he wants to use me, and he will use me! so.. for now i must sit and wait.. and breathe!
What am i waiting for??
A phone call... a phone "interview" of sorts. a moment, a time, and a story that could be what changes my life!
I am waiting for a phone call from the YWAM Hong Kong base. i dont believe they have recieved my application quite yet, but i have been waiting for this call for a little less then 2 weeks. I dont think it will be hard for me to set on the phone and tell someone pretty much everything that i wrote out on myapplication a few weeks ago.
The phone call didnt come in this morning. which is okay, at first i was a little upset, because i missed the phone call last night.. however this moning i know that things can be reschedualed, and that i am working with a country on the other side of the world! i must wait.. and take a few breaths. i can do this! i will do this!
I know what God has called me to.. and i know he wants to use me, and he will use me! so.. for now i must sit and wait.. and breathe!
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
#'s 1 and 2 are Always a Most
Tonight i swallowed my pride and finally stopped spinning my wheels, and decided to move.
No Seriously.. like Moved! into a new home. Over a few hours, me and my dog we realizing that we were going to be sleeping in a new location, with new sounds and smells. We are going to wake up to different surroundings, and get you to finding where we put everything. We also are going to have to re-learn what it takes to live with a roommate... and needless-to-say... that is a tough one!
We made the move down the flight of stairs and into my mom's house (or as Presley calls is.. Grandma's). its funny because i didnt think it would be that weird, however i am really wondering why in the heck did i think this was a good idea? i mean.. I can stand being at my mom's, but i really did enjoy my own space. I dont feel like i have space anymore.. and that scares me a tad-bit.
I think.. no.. i KNOW this is something God wants me to do in preparation of joining YWAM.. but boy oh boy did i not think it would rattle my cage so much! A few days ago i thought i could handle a "slight change" and now, as i sit on my bed, in the dark and silence with my dog curled up next me, with the sound of the TV playing in the other room.. i question why i thought this would be "easy."
The only thing on my To-Do List about this situation.. is to:
1. Pray
2. Sleep
3. Go along with my life as with the confidance that "I can live with my mom for the 10 months and come out out a better person
4. Watch as God turns that confidance into a reality
5. do NOT become a workaholic
6. Walk my dog EVERY morning.. that will be "my own space"
7. read #3 again.. and trust that i can believe those words!
8. snuggle with my dog like we always do, and love her alittle more everday.
9. Eat dinner.. had i had dinner tonight, maybe i wouldnt be feeling so defeated.
10. do #'s 1 and 2 NOW!
No Seriously.. like Moved! into a new home. Over a few hours, me and my dog we realizing that we were going to be sleeping in a new location, with new sounds and smells. We are going to wake up to different surroundings, and get you to finding where we put everything. We also are going to have to re-learn what it takes to live with a roommate... and needless-to-say... that is a tough one!
We made the move down the flight of stairs and into my mom's house (or as Presley calls is.. Grandma's). its funny because i didnt think it would be that weird, however i am really wondering why in the heck did i think this was a good idea? i mean.. I can stand being at my mom's, but i really did enjoy my own space. I dont feel like i have space anymore.. and that scares me a tad-bit.
I think.. no.. i KNOW this is something God wants me to do in preparation of joining YWAM.. but boy oh boy did i not think it would rattle my cage so much! A few days ago i thought i could handle a "slight change" and now, as i sit on my bed, in the dark and silence with my dog curled up next me, with the sound of the TV playing in the other room.. i question why i thought this would be "easy."
The only thing on my To-Do List about this situation.. is to:
1. Pray
2. Sleep
3. Go along with my life as with the confidance that "I can live with my mom for the 10 months and come out out a better person
4. Watch as God turns that confidance into a reality
5. do NOT become a workaholic
6. Walk my dog EVERY morning.. that will be "my own space"
7. read #3 again.. and trust that i can believe those words!
8. snuggle with my dog like we always do, and love her alittle more everday.
9. Eat dinner.. had i had dinner tonight, maybe i wouldnt be feeling so defeated.
10. do #'s 1 and 2 NOW!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
..what could stand against?
"And if Our God is for us, then who could ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what could stand against?
What could stand against?"
Chris Tomlin says it best with those words. If my God is for me.. then who could ever stop me! i have been struggling alot the past week of so, knowing that i have a family who doesnt fully understand my desire to go and serve people in another country. At times, i dont think i fully understand my desire either. However, i want to understand the desire, i want to grow in such a way that i have no doubts in my mind that God is going to use me to shake this world, in ways i never could have thought of!
I have a wonderful group of people who have been in my corner with me and showing me that i have what it takes. Thank you to those people who, even on my bad days, saw past my frustration and emotions of this world. You all have allowed me to strive with all that i have to be a better person and to do what i know God has been calling me to for years!
There are a few people who have really allowed me to know that i can step out of my comfort zone and really just shoot for the stars. I adore you guys, and im so thankful and blessed by how you have invested into my life and my heart!
If Our God is for US... then who can be against us? Who can stand against us?
Thanks for being some of the best friends i have ever encourntered and for holding me up when i wanted to give up and quit! You guys are my family, and i know that i will still struggle but it is such a comfort to know that i have brothers and sisters with amazing hearts and so a quality of compassion..
I know i have this family in my corner.. and thats the family i need!
And if our God is with us, then what could stand against?
What could stand against?"
Chris Tomlin says it best with those words. If my God is for me.. then who could ever stop me! i have been struggling alot the past week of so, knowing that i have a family who doesnt fully understand my desire to go and serve people in another country. At times, i dont think i fully understand my desire either. However, i want to understand the desire, i want to grow in such a way that i have no doubts in my mind that God is going to use me to shake this world, in ways i never could have thought of!
I have a wonderful group of people who have been in my corner with me and showing me that i have what it takes. Thank you to those people who, even on my bad days, saw past my frustration and emotions of this world. You all have allowed me to strive with all that i have to be a better person and to do what i know God has been calling me to for years!
There are a few people who have really allowed me to know that i can step out of my comfort zone and really just shoot for the stars. I adore you guys, and im so thankful and blessed by how you have invested into my life and my heart!
Thanks for being some of the best friends i have ever encourntered and for holding me up when i wanted to give up and quit! You guys are my family, and i know that i will still struggle but it is such a comfort to know that i have brothers and sisters with amazing hearts and so a quality of compassion..
I know i have this family in my corner.. and thats the family i need!
Monday, January 31, 2011
..much to learn..
During the next 10 months.. I have so much planning to learn to not plan for.
I have a trip that will be life changing, and i have to learn be changed, with a willing heart to come back home different.
I have money that I "need to spend", and i have to learn how to save every penny.
I have a life that wants to remain "selfish" and heart that is dying to be layed down.
i have a family that doesnt really seem to care, and a dog that doesnt want me to leave her alone, even for a day.
I have friends that dont know how i will surivive a year in the "Unknown" and a country that thinks i should just "get a degree".
I have a job that doesnt excite me, and an apartment i dont want.
I have a church and a youth group that i adore and cheerish.
I also have a passion that is calling me..
I cannot sit around and wait for one else to take a stand that i have been called to stand for. I refuse to allow someone else to pursue the purpose of my life right now. I have been called to be a missionary in a family that doesnt go to Chruch.. and seems to have no desire to.
i never once thought God would use me. I never thought that i would be ""good enough" to be called by a great God. However, here I am, a youth leader, a worshiper, and a missionary!! An adventure that i always wanted to take on.. and God is asking me to step forward, to more the Kingdom forward.
How do you stand before God and tell him, "No"? I dont know how i did for so long.. but i had excuses. Now i dont, Thankfully!
I have a trip that will be life changing, and i have to learn be changed, with a willing heart to come back home different.
I have money that I "need to spend", and i have to learn how to save every penny.
I have a life that wants to remain "selfish" and heart that is dying to be layed down.
i have a family that doesnt really seem to care, and a dog that doesnt want me to leave her alone, even for a day.
I have friends that dont know how i will surivive a year in the "Unknown" and a country that thinks i should just "get a degree".
I have a job that doesnt excite me, and an apartment i dont want.
I have a church and a youth group that i adore and cheerish.
I also have a passion that is calling me..
I cannot sit around and wait for one else to take a stand that i have been called to stand for. I refuse to allow someone else to pursue the purpose of my life right now. I have been called to be a missionary in a family that doesnt go to Chruch.. and seems to have no desire to.
i never once thought God would use me. I never thought that i would be ""good enough" to be called by a great God. However, here I am, a youth leader, a worshiper, and a missionary!! An adventure that i always wanted to take on.. and God is asking me to step forward, to more the Kingdom forward.
How do you stand before God and tell him, "No"? I dont know how i did for so long.. but i had excuses. Now i dont, Thankfully!
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Something New
8 “But as for you, Israel my servant,
Jacob my chosen one,
descended from Abraham my friend,
9 I have called you back from the ends of the earth,
saying, ‘You are my servant.’
For I have chosen you
and will not throw you away.
10 Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.
Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.
11 “See, all your angry enemies lie there,
confused and humiliated.
Anyone who opposes you will die
and come to nothing.
12 You will look in vain
for those who tried to conquer you.
Those who attack you
will come to nothing.
13 For I hold you by your right hand—
I, the Lord your God.
And I say to you,
‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you.
14 Though you are a lowly worm, O Jacob,
don’t be afraid, people of Israel, for I will help you.
I am the Lord, your Redeemer.
I am the Holy One of Israel.’
15 You will be a new threshing instrument
with many sharp teeth.
You will tear your enemies apart,
making chaff of mountains.
16 You will toss them into the air,
and the wind will blow them all away;
a whirlwind will scatter them.
Then you will rejoice in the Lord.
**Isaiah 41 8:-16
Well, I dont do the blogging thing much..(ever) but I am going to start a new plan/path in my life that God has set before me. This will allow others to follow me along the jouney, and to be apart of the process with me! (Community is an important thing)
Long story short, im planning on going to Asia for a year starting in Dec 2011. It will be a great time to learn, and walk in a very close relationship with Christ. This is also allow me to lean more into God's heart and by doing that I hope to have it revealed to me what it is I am to be doing with my life. I have a huge heart for missions, and for people.. so why not learn how to better serve others with the gift I already have!?
I am joining a group called Youth With A Mission (YWAM) and I could be more excited about it!! I have set out my Application and have a few more people to talk to about my trip and get the proper game plan figured out! However its an exciting journey i have been called to i cant wait to get the ball rolling and start really putting the peddle to the medal and working hard to make this dream come true!
i invite you to join with me in the journey of reaching and serving people on the other side of the world, and allowing them to hear the Good News of Christ!
Jacob my chosen one,
descended from Abraham my friend,
9 I have called you back from the ends of the earth,
saying, ‘You are my servant.’
For I have chosen you
and will not throw you away.
10 Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.
Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.
11 “See, all your angry enemies lie there,
confused and humiliated.
Anyone who opposes you will die
and come to nothing.
12 You will look in vain
for those who tried to conquer you.
Those who attack you
will come to nothing.
13 For I hold you by your right hand—
I, the Lord your God.
And I say to you,
‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you.
14 Though you are a lowly worm, O Jacob,
don’t be afraid, people of Israel, for I will help you.
I am the Lord, your Redeemer.
I am the Holy One of Israel.’
15 You will be a new threshing instrument
with many sharp teeth.
You will tear your enemies apart,
making chaff of mountains.
16 You will toss them into the air,
and the wind will blow them all away;
a whirlwind will scatter them.
Then you will rejoice in the Lord.
**Isaiah 41 8:-16
Well, I dont do the blogging thing much..(ever) but I am going to start a new plan/path in my life that God has set before me. This will allow others to follow me along the jouney, and to be apart of the process with me! (Community is an important thing)
Long story short, im planning on going to Asia for a year starting in Dec 2011. It will be a great time to learn, and walk in a very close relationship with Christ. This is also allow me to lean more into God's heart and by doing that I hope to have it revealed to me what it is I am to be doing with my life. I have a huge heart for missions, and for people.. so why not learn how to better serve others with the gift I already have!?
I am joining a group called Youth With A Mission (YWAM) and I could be more excited about it!! I have set out my Application and have a few more people to talk to about my trip and get the proper game plan figured out! However its an exciting journey i have been called to i cant wait to get the ball rolling and start really putting the peddle to the medal and working hard to make this dream come true!
i invite you to join with me in the journey of reaching and serving people on the other side of the world, and allowing them to hear the Good News of Christ!
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